C'mon With Your Wives

Okay, so it was today, 1:45 pm. and I'm still in bed, when like a Saint, a real live angel from heaven, my brother who works from 4pm to 3am. called and invited me to come out and walk the park with him. A whole different look to the day. In a half hour I got a shower and a ham sandwich and an orange and was ready to go. I had not been asleep, I was just laying there with nothing to do, well, I do need to break up the winter wind sticks and bag them for the trash pick-up, but like I said 1:45pm and I'm just laying in bed listening to Rush Limbaugh go on and on about Clint Eastwood's Super Bowl public service announcement about General Motors.

Before that I listened to Christian radio and it was about marriage. And these pastors and Christian commentors were throwing it in with "the guys". With a lot of yeah it happens, they were talking about the 99+% of people who believe in a soul mate. Like even marriage gets stale and you all think the way of the world start dating and going out places and start loving the fun of talking, but then marriage gets stale and you all think just start the process again with someone new and different. And they are saying these things about the mothers of their children and the women that raise their children and are here in this world for the greater them, their family. And they say she rolls to the left and he rolls to the right and she covers her head with a pillow and threatens to sleep off a day of anger, contrary to that proverb about don't let the sun set on your anger. You are to settle conflict before the sun goes down.

And anyhow I am single, with voices in my head and images that flash constantly and today I was in bed until 1:45 pm. I am not there doing the side by side additional work of some man's family and extra personal needs. I am a needy person, low motivation and these wives these guys are dissing are probably pretty fantastic as far as capable and working daily for what the family needs. They probably are employed, something I am not. What am I saying? Think about worse, I think about it sometimes how little I have to offer, being a needy person, needing things to do and ability and motivation. And focus, like if focus could be bought, focus around the barrage of voices and images, what would I pay for it. Is it worth all the income I don't have because I do have schizophrenia. Instead of....everything I don't have.

And I wanted to go on here about how I'm okay when..... Like I'm okay when I'm smoking and I bet those Christian guys aren't even putting up with as much as that, and I'm okay when I have my Pepsi, and those guys are complaining about stale marriages. And like smoking is an activity and listening to the right music, like that is an activity, when things are calm, I'm okay then and those guys get so much more in their bargains. I say send her some roses and mean it. This week 100 rose buds 19.99$ you know, Valentine's Day. Appreciate your great wife, be glad you didn't get a needy person with a disability. A pig in bed at 1:45 pm.