Schizophrenia and cats

So I got my dessert for tomorrow baked, got the dishes done. Pretty good for having gotten up twice once at two pm. So the cats, it helps me to talk about them as demanding animals and bed hogs. They are always there either around my head or wanting my hands to be petted or right there in the center of the bed, a lump a dead weight right where I want to shift my legs to. So I heard some radio comedy, thank God, today. It was pretty good, different. Some guy went out to clean up the back yard of his apartment and met his neighbors after five years. And then what they decided they needed were chickens, and they got them, and then had to get rid of them or pay a fine, the rooster was disturbing some woman's pregnancy. They hid the rooster under the kitchen floorboards, when the officer was there, but then the rooster started crowing and they got caught.

So who is this to, am I thinking my other brother or those long lost friends will find my writing, am I writing to them? I slept alright last night sometimes its hard with the voices, I've been applying for jobs, but I'm sure its the End Times so what's the point. It just feels like the End Times, like with all the innocents being murdered and feeling like the work force is dwindling and weak, so then Jesus will come, but will he come to the US? How do you have that figured, the next coming of Jesus? I feel it. With everything so empty. For some years it was music, I could invest in music, it payed back, talked to me, but now its just so much glitter, no substance, just what it is. Not much.

And I'm having a hard time with books too, maybe its the meds, but I think it is just that there is no sharing. That is seriously important in these things we take in. They need to be shared. I mean, I read aloud, but....to who? for why? So anyhow if I get to give advice, be sure to share from your inputs, whatever, TV, radio, books, music, magazines...be sure to share your thoughts, your response to what you put in. I'm listening to Purdue's basketball game against Northwestern. It's 26-22 at half time.

So the voices today, finally got me up to make that dessert and get dishes done. What else? They sang to me a few tunes.... Smelly Girl oh, smelly girl, oh, how you need a shower.... and "what if there is a greater purpose, what if I'm missing out" You know, My Own Little World," "Stopped at a red light, looked out my window, saw a cardboard sign said help this homeless widow" And "Light, Light, light up the world" one was earlier, one was right now. Thoughts and a running thought like sound track, all inside my skull.

I like me here, I am so human and not promoting too much, not like some of the others. And the voices say, don't I see, we are winning, it has something to do with something. Like me being unemployed is a good thing, not only because its the End Times and what's the point? But also it helps us, at the winning thing. Anyhow no one is pressuring me to get a job. Quite the opposite. Maybe its a compliment to people who work, you are all better than me. And if I was as good as you people would want me to work. But I'm not so,,,,